Talking With Kids About Trauma
One of the teachers in my daughter’s school was recently in an accident. While she was able to come back to work after a period of time, she looked different and had some limitations in what she could do. As we all know, accidents are common and injuries happen.
When accidents happen, it’s important to talk to kids honestly about what has occurred.
Graphic and detailed information is typically not needed. Brief, accurate, and age-appropriate information can be provided, followed by lots of time for questions and discussion about kids’ thoughts about the incident.
An example might be: “Mrs. Jones was in a bike accident. She fell from her bike and hurt her neck and broke her leg. When we see her next week she will have a few bandages on her face, a cast on her leg and will be using crutches.”
This might be followed by something like this: “You know, accidents happen. So that’s why we wear bike helmets and ride on the sidewalks.”

Some other things to be aware of:
- Some kids won’t seem to care about the person who has experienced the trauma. That’s OK, we all deal with things differently. They may show concern at a later time, or not at all.
- Kids may become very concerned about their own safety and the safety of their loved ones. For example, in the above case a child might be nervous to ride their own bike following the trauma. Brief re-assurance and a review of safety precautions (helmets, etc) are appropriate.
- Children who have a history of trauma may have a particularly hard time when a new trauma arises, even if it doesn’t concern them directly. In this case, providing extra time for open-ended discussion about the past and current trauma is important.
- Kids who show symptoms of depression or anxiety may benefit from talking to a mental health professional, including a school counselor or psychologist. Symptoms might include, difficulty sleeping, lack of interest in previously pleasurable activities, increased tearfulness, and isolation/withdraw. Kids might also complain of physical ailments like stomach and headaches.
Photo by mikemcilveen (via Flickr)
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