More than Celebrity Gossip – True Grief after the Death of an Icon
Many of us were shocked, saddened and confused at Michael Jackson’s death last week, especially as his death was so close to the deaths of other celebrities, including Farah Fawcett and Ed McMahon. We are bombarded by stories about the King of Pop’s death, was it accidental, the fault of his physician, foul play? We may never know, but the sadness we are feeling is real – for many of us, just as real as the grief we experience at the passing of a friend, neighbor, or co-worker. Some may wonder how this is possible given that most of us never met Jackson (or Fawcett or McMahon), but these larger-than-life figures often played a significant role in our lives nonetheless. There are many reasons why we might feel close to a celebrity like Jackson:
They are there during some of the most memorable times of our lives. First slow dances at the prom, first intimate moments with a lover, weddings, funerals, birthdays, graduations. Jackson provided the soundtrack to many of our lives. And as a result, when we hear “Billie Jean” or “Beat It” we are transported back in time to that school dance in the gym in a way that pictures or diary entries just can’t.
We are privy to a lot (maybe too much?) information regarding celebrities’ lives. We know as much or more about them than we know about a close friend. We see pictures of weddings, babies, divorce decrees, pictures of their vacations, and courtroom dramas. As for Jackson, we watched him shine, and we watched him be destroyed by the media. How could we help but feel close to this man who we got to know thru tabloid pictures, music videos, and awards programs for 40 years?
Another reason the passing of a celebrity can be so grief-provoking is that it can remind us all of our own mortality. When I think of Jackson’s music, I remember roller-skating in a leotard and leg warmers at the Rollerama; round and round the rink to “Thriller” and “Smooth Criminal.” When he died, it provoked those wonderful memories, but also reminded me that those times are long gone, and I will never experience them again. This is a sort of death too.
So as we watch or listen to tributes to our favorite celebrities, then watch their funerals being broadcast all over the world, I hope that we will know it is ok to grieve, and cry, and mourn their passing just as we would a “real” friend.
Filed under: Uncategorized, Work/Life
