Your Mind Your Body

Good news for New Year’s resolutions!

You can now get help from mobile apps that send you reminders, keep you organized, keep track of what you eat, drink, smoke or spend, and monitor your exercise. There are thousands of apps for whatever lifestyle or health behavior you want to improve. See lists of some popular apps here and here.

Sticking to New Year’s resolutions is easier than ever … or is it? Like that treadmill gathering dust in the dark corner, mobile apps “work” only if you do. Technology does make certain tasks easier and more convenient. But no app can melt fat off your body, get a college degree, or improve your relationships without your active commitment and involvement.

The secret to success in making your New Year’s resolutions stick is not in finding the perfect app. It’s in adopting the right mindset.

Habit change requires sustained effort over a period of months. Are you ready for that? Answer the following three questions:

1. Is this a New Year’s resolution? Or simply a New Year’s wish?

A resolution is a firm decision marked by commitment and a plan. If you don’t have both, it’s just a wish. Example: Wish: I want to be more physically fit. Resolution: I commit to going to the gym 4 times per week, and will schedule it so that nothing interferes with my plan.

Success tip: Make your resolution behavior-specific and non-negotiable, for a specific length of time e.g., 3 months.

2. Am I making this resolution because I’m disgusted with myself? or because I love and respect myself?

Being disgusted with yourself may jumpstart your motivation, but it’s not enough to sustain effort over time. Self-loathing ultimately drains you of energy, making it more and more difficult to keep going. On the other hand, self-respect builds emotional energy, making it easier to carry on, even when the going gets tough.

Success tip: Write down 3 reasons why you deserve to do the work required for your success. Make copies and post them in several places where you can see them throughout the day.

3. Am I prepared for discomfort and sacrifice?

Behavioral change is uncomfortable. You may have withdrawal symptoms, urges and thoughts of giving up. That’s normal. The good news is that the discomfort doesn’t last forever. The symptoms come and go, and eventually become less frequent and less intense.

Success tip: When you experience physical or emotional discomfort while trying to change a habit or behavior, reframe the way you think of it. Hunger pangs? Great! That means the diet is working and you’ll soon be burning fat. Sore muscles? Terrific! That’s proof of your determination to exercise. Approached someone for a date and got rejected? Well, it’s nothing to celebrate. But you did survive. And you’re ready to meet someone new.

Bonus tip: Here’s a link to a list of free resources for new beginnings in your health management, education, finance, career and community service.

Photo by Rudy Herman (via Flickr)

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You work hard all year. Holiday office parties are a time to relax, have fun and get to know your co-workers better.  But watch it, or you may undermine your chances for raises and promotions. You’re not on the clock, but for all intents and purposes, you’re still on the job.

Here are some tips to keep your behavior under control, and still have a good time at your office party:

• Dress modestly.  If you want pizzazz, go for flashy jewelry.  The office party is not the place to show off your new revealing outfit, especially if you care about your professional image.

• Limit alcohol. You’ll be less likely to say and do things that you’ll later regret.  If you tend to have “way too much fun” when you drink, stay dry at the office party.

• Watch your mouth. Cursing and sexual innuendos may be taken the wrong way, even at parties. Play it safe by using language that won’t haunt you 6 months from now.

• Keep your hands to yourself.  Under the guise of “fun” some folks get a bit too touchy-feely at parties.  Don’t risk sexual harassment charges.  If hugging is the norm among your coworkers, hug them as you would your great aunt.

• Assume that photos will be taken and posted online.  These photos can stay online forever. Years from now, how would you like to be depicted?

Photo from *Clos* Photostream via Flickr

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Pre-holiday sales are nothing new. But now merchants are sweetening the pot with extra discounts, bonus points, free shipping and more. 

If you’re not careful, your bargain shopping can be very expensive. My kids have heard me say many times, “Let’s leave the store now. I can’t afford to save any more money.”

Shopping is not a rational process. If it were, we’d buy strictly what we need. Instead, we generally purchase what we want, and justify it afterwards. e.g., “I wouldn’t usually pay that much for lime-green shoes. These don’t even go with much in my closet. But they were half off the regular price of $300, and they’re really comfortable.”

Sales and discount prices may seem to be about rational numbers. But they are engineered to influence you on a deep emotional level.

Here are some ways that merchants get you to part with your money:

Price anchoring – Anything on sale mentions the “regular price” of the item, which serves as an anchor – the basis of comparison with the discounted price.

Suppose  you are looking at 2 very similar sweaters: one is the store brand priced at $30 (not on sale) and the other is a name brand marked down from $79 to $45. Chances are you would be willing to spend the extra 15 bucks, because you are “saving” so much on the deal. If that same sweater were regularly priced at $45 would you still choose it?

Scarcity – Anything that is limited, whether it’s time or resources, tends to make us want it more. That’s why ads with the following phrases get us motivated to buy:

• Time-limited sale – “Today only;” “Door-buster special 8 -10 am;” “Offer expires at midnight”
• Limited supply – “Only 12 left;” “Limited edition;” “They’re flying off the shelves;” Blue-light special (where mobs of people flock to a merchandise table)
• Last chance to save – “When they’re gone, they’re gone forever.”

Some online and TV merchants create a sense of scarcity by displaying the quantity of an item remaining as other orders are filled, and/or by showing a count-down timer reminding you that time is running out.

Free extras – High-end cosmetic companies often include a bunch of samples “valued at $58” (according to them) with any purchase from their already expensive product line. Thus, you can justify spending $25 for lipstick, because of all the free stuff that comes with it (most of which you probably won’t use.)

People tend to buy more when something free is included. Have you ever stocked up on buy-one-get-one free offers for items that you would not usually even buy one of?  Or charged more than you can afford on your credit card in order to get travel miles? It’s hard to resist, because it seems like such a bargain – and we hate the thought of losing out on it, even if it’s for something we don’t need or want.

Everybody loves free, including me. A while back I was shopping online for a simple cable. I found two with similar specs and equally good reviews. One cost $6.95 plus $2.95 for shipping, bringing the total to $9.90. The other was $12.95 with free shipping. I confess that I vacillated between the two, because somehow the more expensive item seemed like a better bargain due to the free shipping!

As you can see, even knowing how powerful “free” can be, did not fully protect me from falling for it. It took a few minutes for my logic to override my emotions, and I did end up ordering the less expensive cable (which works just fine).

How to not go broke on bargains

Low price is not a bargain if you don’t need or use the item, There’s actually a cost to owning stuff that you don’t need. It takes up space and gets in the way. Once you’ve owned it for a while, your thrill of procuring the item will fade, eclipsed by annoyance at having to store and move it.

Next time you’re shopping for items on sale, be selective. Ask yourself:

• Will this item improve my life or that of the person I’m gift-shopping for?
• The item that I’m getting for free – would I pay for it if it weren’t free?
• Do I have an intended recipient for this gift item?
• Is this gift something the recipient likely wants? Or is it just that I want them to have it?
• If I let this one “get away” how much will I really regret it later?

And one more thing …Eat before you go shopping. Hunger is a motivator, and might motivate you into buying more than you bargained for.

(For more info about what motivates buying decisions, check out Dr. Dan Ariely’s writing and research.)

Photo by jzlomek

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